sleeping with someone too soon - your agenda is neediness. you want attention and are keen to please and you need to be valued and desired. you may also assume that if you give people what they want, they'll give it right back. you feel that physical affirmation from the opposite sex will raise your self-esteem.

having sex when you don't feel like it - your agenda is maintaining the relationship you're in. you have a tendency to be the caretaker of the relationship, the person who will do anything to make sure it endures even if it means ignoring your own anxieties and frustrations. this fear of asking for what you really want can be rooted in childhood particularly for woman who felt their father paid them little attention.

having sex to reward or punish your partner - your agenda is a need to feel in control. you are using sex as a bargaining tool. again this is probably rooted in childhood experience where you didn't feel you had the power to make your own decisions or express your own opinions. if you've always felt imposed upon, sexual bargaining feels like a way of taking power back.

being unfaithful - your agenda is avoidance. you have difficulty talking through issues in your relationship. you may feel hurt, abandoned, angry or bored but rather than owning up to these emotions you find it easier to sleep with someone else. it could also be that commitment scares you, so again you use sex to avoid communication.