saturday. weekends are here again. would it be another boring weekend? hahaha..

me.. have an idea recently.
to buy a flat with either one of my parent. for renting purposes? to earn some income? haha..

dunno if it will work out. but i know there will be lots of research and asking around.

the bad thing is.. i invested my cpf last year.. and now, based on recent fund prices, i made losses of about $4k.. SIGH..

wednesday. ah boy is having a cold and cough.

my mum.. she was busy on sunday, busy in the kitchen. and so now, she's feeling pain all over, not in a very good mood, throwing tantrums.

:-(

whenever e mood at home is tense, i dun feel like going home. not as guai as what other ppl think. i really felt like staying out of home today.

but then.. i still went back home on dot today. dunno is nowhere to go or went home out of guilt. oh well...

questions. questions. alot of questions in my mind.

do u hate me for messing up ur life, ur thoughts?
will it be a passing cloud?
i still owe you something.

find myself so mean. hurt my good friend. feel so guilty. cant act nothing has happened.

but i did not lie to you.


she said. do not have expectations before you start. and that one's likes do not lasts.


when i cant sleep at night at times, i wonder.. what exactly happens when one die? suddenly fear overcome me. i feel very afraid. afraid of losing everything i have now.

possessive-attachment.
to overcome possessive-attachment, understand that impermanence exists. everything changes, nothing lasts. one day, death will separate us from the people we love. but we can love people without being attached to them by living with the awareness of the inevitable separation. we can appreciate and love for them now and at the same time be ready to say goodbye to them when the time comes.

teambuilding. the topic.. of the week.

this year's teambuilding at bintan. rafting, paintball and dunno what pyramid challenge. interesting right? but i am not going. i dun like to play all these stuff lah.. if i were to go, think my bones will all break..

my colleagues officers have been asking me to go...
but deep down, i really dun feel like going.. but i feel paiseh when they asked me to go... argh.. so troubling..

am i anti social?
i just dun wan to force myself to do the things i dun like....

..........

有一些人或感觉，就像 passing clouds.

appears suddenly. disappears very fast also.


很快的，你现在所有的感觉就会消失了。。

如果过了很久很久以后，感觉还在，一切的事情还有希望。。
如果那时后一切不同了，那就是有缘无份。

要明白大家都不是圣人，包括自己。

my colleague told me, 小病是福。
and.. yes.. i agree with her..


tuesday. went for my aerobics class.
yeah, finally started my exercise... for this year.. hahaha!

he msn me again.

testing out my webcam, he says.
me: orh.. i nv used it before..
him: hahaha..

*shakes head*
just speechless...

sunday. went for dim sum. the china square teahouse had shifted to far east square. din even know china square was under renovation. hahaha long time since we went china square for lunch.

the food not bad.. but my aunt say that they got lesser variety. but to me, it looks the same. hmm...

then went src for swimming. well, it was more fun with my three little cousins around. and ah boy.. he just stick to peanuts.. hahaha..

and.. weekends are over..
time flies.


suddenly have a thought.
if one day we were to be in need of money, would my friends or relatives be willing to help us?
i wonder..... or would they all run away?
hmm.....

saturday. online.

chris msn me. asked me about rmit. he's going to study in unisim in july.

he knew i was promoted recently. news travel....
he say he expected the promotion.. and that i was promoted twice during the time i was with him..

as if he got such good memory... was i promoted twice? i dun remember.. hahaha..

friday. weekends are here. it is father's day this week.

made a dim sum reservation this sunday. together with aunt justina's family. arranged to go swimming after dim sum.

thursday. my parents aren't talking to each other. :-(

my dad told me that he visited yong-pa the day before. skinny. went for few cycles of injection. think for cancer, the doc needs to measure the level of something after the injections, doc says the level needs to be 17 before the injections can be stopped. his current level is 19.

i hope he will be blessed. i hope things will turn out to be fine. i hope he will feel better. i pray very hard.

rushed home after work. the house needs a fire extinguisher. think the atmosphere at home sort of cooled down abit.

lucky lucky..

wednesday. my mother woke up, dunno for what reason, threw her temper again.

these kind of days are getting so frequent. i think she always throw her temper when her knees are aching. oh well..

and me.. always get upset when i see her throwing tantrums. as in, i just dun like it when i see either one of them upset or unhappy. it just makes me.. moody lor.

had dinner with ic. long time since i had dinner with him. chatted lots.
he.. kind of matured after getting married. hahaha..

night time. raining. think it will be a good night sleep.

stomach not feeling good today. felt so hungry during the train trip back home, so nausea.. argh, i hate that feeling!

i think its because of the chocolate-banana cake from secret receipes i had yesterday. such a big piece and i finished it. :-(

well, it was sung hoon's last day with us and so he bought us some food. our korean guy is leaving us.

argh! shouldnt have finished the cake... arghhh!!!

feeling stressed lately. well, that explains the pain i have been feeling.
new one, arms aching these days.. probably because of the stiff shoulders..
SIGH..

sunday. went to chai chee, my cousin's house for family gathering. well, its time for dumplings again.

there is a shop at bedok, selling nice and pretty cheap clothes. my cousin knew the shop owner, so she recommended me. now i am addicted to the shop, always ask her to bring me to the shop when i am back at chai chee. hehee, so i went, only bought one top...

thereafter i put them aeroplane and went to ic house for mahjong again. hahaha!
ys came to fetch me. actually i asked him for it. well, open your mouth and ask and you will get it!
this time round, there were more than enough people. me yp kitty ys and ic!

yes, i asked all of them along and of course, i was prepared not to play. frankly speaking, i am just addicted to the puzzle fighter hahaha!

and so.. they played. i played puzzle fighter with ic's wife. ho ho!
stayed for dinner and reached home around 12am plus.


2 years have passed.

friday. yue liang exchanged her psp with me. and so, i borrowed the tv cable from ic, wanted to connect the psp to the tv so that my dad can play.

called ic. wanted to just go pop over and get the cable from him. in the end, he said his wife was out and that he was free.. hahaha, so what else but mahjong with him?

jio the finally-exams-over de ys. and together with yp.

played till 3am plus. went for some food and i reached home at 4am.

TIRED.

sat morning. heard my mum's loud voice. it was raining. couldnt hear clearly. and so i woke up... my sister again lor.

dunno what went wrong. my mum just throw tantrums again. my sister black face again.

SIGh. what a sight early in the morning, and when i needed sleep.

no choice. but the atmosphere got better when my dad reached home.

i think.. this house needs peaceful makers like me and my dad. if we are not around, think this home will explode. hahaha!!

2 bad tempered woman with a talkative kid.


as much as we do not want to deal with the problems in our family, we have no choice, right? because we are those who won't forsake our family.
:-)

saturday. mj day at ic house, with mao and yp.

i really like the view from ic house, be it from the living room or from the room where we were playing mj in.

played until 11pm. actually they wanted to have one more round, but then i din want lah, going to end pretty late lor. and so we ended.

in the end, we stayed till 12am plus cos we were in the living room playing the PS3. well, ic has only got one cute game, that is puzzle fighter. frankly speaking, i have seen ppl playing in arcades but i never tried playing before.

mao exclaimed said that it was a game that was famous in secondary school. what was i doing, never played the game before??

its true mah.. and so they tried to teach me. but then i dun learn things so easily one, and so i gave up, let them play.. never really catch the ball. hahaha!